HEY MY DEAR LOYAL READERS.
I WONT BE BLOGGING ANYMORE.
ITS A PERSONAL PROBLEM.
BUT, CONTINUE TO TAG AITE PPL.
I DECLARE THIS BLOG OVER.
SMS ME IF THERES ANYTHING.
TAKECARE EVERYONE.
I'LL RESTORE MY BLOG WHEN MY LIFE FALLS INTO PLACE.


-FANA-

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WANIE, DINEE AND FEEQA. HAPPY BDAE TO YOU.
-grrlfrens 2005-

thats how we celebrated their bdae today. haha. all of us. really appreaciate it. i love get togethers with dem. dey really rawk my world. all of dem are sixteen. except me. i'm daa youngest. haha. my bdae is a long way ahead. haha. its okey. its just another bdae to me. nothing special. dont need to celebrate.




blow dinie blow.. haha.. bought a cake yesterday.. all 6 of us contributed and celebrated after our prelims just now. we had fun. GRRLFRENS 2005. at last, we took a picture together.





SEVEN OF US.
yana, ishaa, qeela, ika, wanie, dini, farah and myself.
make up daa whole grp. haha.
love dem. we put cream on each other's face. really takbley angkat.
hahaks.. it was FUN. isha and me were fighting over cherries. haha.
hope we would stay grrlfrens forever.
cos i love dem all.
they make up part of me.

Back to today's exam.
SOCIAL STUDIES. major headache. haha
i was giving up.
time management so poor.
i dint finish my second essay. or shud i say
my second essay was distorted. as my handwriting was like SHIT.
i spent daa last ten minutes doing it.
i bet daa ideas dont flow. haha.
i'll FAIL. trust me.

maths was okey.
managable
BUT THEN AGAIN.
fana's careless.
so, i dont dare to estimate or judge.
i'll hope fer daa best. best best.
so that my mom wont judge me anymore.
muahaha.

i was so tired after studying fer ss last night.
i was sleeping on my desk.
but woke up at two plus. and went to sleep again.
but, daa paper wasnt as easyas i expected.
eeee. geramnyerrr... haha.

i've tried.
i know i did. just hope i will do well.
lalala.**
i'm hungry. haha.
i'll revise fer science and geog today.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONCE AGAIN TO DAA THREE ANGELS OF MINE.
HAPPY SIXTEEN-ING.
LOVE YOU GUYS TO BITS.



*miss reality*

*grrlies*

instead of paying attention, we were playing at daa baq of daa class. and my dear yana look so cute. hahaks. look at her. haha. i had a great day in school. i always do. only that i feel tired today. daa past week had been so hectic. i dint have time fer myself. pheww. hectic week.


*recesstime*

tomorrow, its already prelims two. i am 75 percent prepared fer it. i knew i tried my very best to cover topics. daa rest is all up to me tmw. insyallah.. maths, my congurency and similar figures eeeyeerrr. haha. so rabak. hmmp. my angles also. all over daa place. haha. aiyoness. hmm. social studies, i plan to do industralisation. but muhaimin told me to cover up my sec4 topic as well.. i'll do it later at midnight maybe.. mirza called to ask fer maths consultation over daa fone. haha. so funny. then sara asked me fer help for social studies. and muhaimin called to talk abt stuffs.. I'M JUST AS STRESSED AS YOU ARE MEAN. haha.


* outside daa class*

who isnt stressed at this moment. i'm afraid i wont do well. really afraid. i had enough failing my prelim one. ROJAK. haha. 2 O lvl passes. haha. aiyo yo. must do better this time. i hope i hope. puhleeezzz. haha. with 3 distinctions at 3 B's haha. DREAM ON FANA. i doubt it would ever happen to me. i feel drifted. i dont talk to my family members anymore. i stay up at night alone. nobody to talk to. nobody to keep me company. i guess thats life and reality... and thats when my family drifts away.. i'm not alone am i? i hope not.


* just us*

basically, now, i am tired. my brain wanna stop and shut down. at times, my brains wanna reboot and reformat. hahaks. screw lose already. i wanna give up. but i cant. i cant. everytime i see my sister's o lvl cert, i'll start crying. thats how bad it is. she scored 4 A's... in a JC. i'll get worried. worry if i dont do as well as her. and if i dont, i know what i'll get from ppl at home. damnn. education here is really tough and competitive. but i guess i'll have to be brave and face it. must must. i'm superwoman. haha. wadever fana. wadever.


* smileee.* aww. my darlings.

mom is still daa same. pressure at home is too much. reallie too much.
uhh. wish i was superwoman. its so painful living at home.
stress i get. i have to commit myself to so many tings at home.
i cant take it. AHHHH . i wanna screammm.
puhleez. somebody understand me..
stressful life. hectic. and i'm drifting away.


*fun in class. weee.*


puhleez pull me baq.
puhleez save me from all these.
somebody, puhleez save me.
from all this shit.
i wish i could run away.
but this is reality.
i wish somebody...
face it with me.

*miss reality*

good luck fer ppl taking prelims tmw.
all daa best.
i'm drifting away.
haha.

i miss you

great day. thats how i shall describe my day today.. i'm a lil bit not focused today. i've been thinking hard abt something lately. it bothers me. haha. blekk. not gonna tell you what. hahhaa. *peace* haha.


i had fun laughing with ppl today. really really had fun in school. first period was maths. did june paper. went thru daa answers. it was a long maths lesson. haha. time just passes by very slowly. english, me and yana were snapping pictures in class.( thanks to zaki's camera) haha.. snap snap. muhaimin was making silly faces. haha. and zaki wanted to pose a pic pointing his middle finger and ms teo saw it. haha. so funny. she looked so shocked. all of us burst out laughing. physics was alryte.. frustrating cos my concept on physics is still not strong. no strong foundation, i cant build my home. haha. wadever fana. wadever. haha.


RECESS. riiingg. so happy. haha. today, i moderated my food intake. eat less. haha. and isha was still slapping my butt. haha. she said she loves me. you should know her. haha. blekk. haha. took pics with feeqa's new fone. yay! haha. nevamind. i'll get my ngage soon. haha. boo! i love you ngage. haha.. recess ended. had chemistry. did mole concept. okey la. need practice if not i'll forget. haha. i'm sucha fergetful person. mayb i'll end up fergetting my name. haha.
graduation ceremony fer daa sec4 na's and nt students. we sent them off fer their n lvls. wish dem luck and all daa best.


as fer me. back to reality.
though my mind will drift and drift.
haha. i'm lacking of focus.
i love to dream and wonder.
about... jeng jeng jeng. haha.


500 free sms-es not used up.
bill ending in 2 days time. haha.
start flooding my inbox ppl.

* miss reality*
missing you;

blaquness.

i look scary. i know. hahaa.


nine pm.


it felt as if it was earlier this morn. its a chilly and breezy night today. i love daa weather today.superb. i could only spot a few stars from above. its been a while since i saw dem.. at last, i wished upon a star and that brought me baq to reality.

REALITY FANA. REALITY. YES YES. I MEAN REALITY. haha.
i keep falling back. and i dud noe why. hhaha. screw lose.
hmm. in daa morning, dint have PE lesson. sat in comp lab. it was fun.
i sat beside yana. my lesbo partner in class. haha. no laa. bluff only la. haha.

english lesson, did some vocab worksheets.. it was fun. yana sat beside me.
now you know why i enjoy sitting with her. she makes me laugh so hard. haha.
love her. love her. haha. malay, chatted with mean. RELATIONSHIP PARANOID.
haha. being " doctoress love" i consoled him. hahaha. blekk. haha.

recess, ate. and i realie ate alot. atika said to me not to eat alot even though i'm stressed.
i think i am. prelims are coming up. eeeee. nightmare. accounts, did incomplete records.
yana and me were saying " bite bite me" hahaks.. double meaning there. haha.. met farah at 5 and studied at mcdee till nine. did social studies and maths. haha. now, i'm tired. but must push myself harder. study more tonight.




i may face reality all alone.
afraid. i'm afraid.

*miss reality*

*boo.

advertiseee.


realiie bored. heh.


before i left home. haha.


realiie bored. haha




tired. tired. lalala. i'm feeling so tired today. and i dunt know why. haha. boring day i guess.
yepp. so boring.

first period was accounts. it was okey. joined tables again. this time it was wani, yana, me, farah, nazhira and zhenjun. haha. it was fun. we did incomplete records together. and i really clarified my doubts. haha. weee. so happy. at last i know how to do. can score part of the 20 marks already. haha. alhamdulilah.

next was chemistry.. we did mole concept again. haha. this time, i understood better. only for formulas and concentration. need to really memorise daa formulaes.. it wasnt draggy. thank gawd yana sat beside me. i begged her to teach me till i get it correct. haha. you need to be desperate at times when it comes to studies. haha. beg and beg. hahaha.

maths, teacher didnt come. basically did our own stuffs.. i already did my junepaper. and . PHEW. FANA, careless again. hahaks. really careless. blekkkk. haha. kambing betol..haha. recess, ate chicken chop again.%2

*org kahwin/*

tired. tired. woke up early in daa morning. need to go to org kahwin. urgghh. eleven o clock, went out of daa hse.. made our way to yishun..yada yada. not many ppl. so not crowded. hahaks. can breatheeeee. haha.. eat eat. abt half an hour, left daa place fer sengkang. sedara tunang. haha. when i reflected back, it was just a while ago we were kids and we played together. he's now big and getting engaged already. NGAGE. haha.


me and cousins.


me and salwa.


daa cousins.


daa ring




reached there. eat againnn. hahaks. eat and eat. i drank tea all daa way. hahaks. must jaga my throat okeyy. hahaks. at abt two, must carry barang hantaran to daa grrl's house at woodlands. haha. exchange of gifts la katakan.. hahaks. i must help carry bunga rampai. hahaks. luckily i dint wear heels. if not, aduhh. haha.. reached there. house so crowded. super crowded. perspire alot. haha. then met one physco. he keeps snapping ppl's picture. really physco sehh. so irritated. havent ready oso snap. hahak.


we dont look like sisters do we? haha.


a baby's touch

fanaaa. haha.

then take picture and stuff. go makan. again. haha. dunno today how many times i ate.. then this guy wanna take pic of me and my cousins. really physco. i told my cousin ah. dierni taktau malu. haha. and i guess he heard. haha..wadeverness. haha. tapi memang taktau malu pon. haha. then went baq to sengkang and chilled. really tired and bored.. all fighting fer daa fan. kepanasan. and fishmonger salwa dint wanna share daa fan. hahaks. blueghhh you cousin . haha.

tmw's school again.
i'm still sick though. urrggghhh.
lazy. yes yes. fana's lazy.
super lazy ahh.
got physics summoreeee.
eyerr.
tomorrow long day.
and i'm so bored now.
prelims on fridayyyyyy.
boooo.!

wweee

see. i look sick. haha.


its twelve o nine. haha. 12.09 laaa. hahaks. i tink my brain got crack. haha. oke fine wadever
fana. wadever. hahaks. i was knocked out last night . first time i dint wake up in daa early morning. haha. slept at twelve midnight till 9am in daa morning. considered late fer me though.
i had fever. i felt cold and shivering. and daa sun was shining brightly. hahaks.

bathe. then took my breakfast. again, i had big appetite. haha. one egg tart. 3 peanut butter bread. haha. greedy hah. hahaks. and one glass of plain water. ate my medication. and started on my social studies revision. i recaped my industralisation. and did one essay from daa TYS without referring to daa notes. haha. WELL DONE. haha.

i have maths tuition at 2. my energy is drained out already. aiyoness. if i cant concentrate, daa tutor cant blame me. i was forced to sit thru daa tuition. haha. nevamind laa. prelims next friday maths and ss. hahaks. must must pass. at least pass my maths. gonna crack my head. after tuition, i'll rest fer a while and start doing my accounts. i'm so lazy to do accounts and i'm bad at it. hahaks. laziness. SEE. fana's lazy. hahaks. mayb i'll take into consideration of going to business course in poly.. mayb lorr.
cos ppl have been telling me that i have to clean up ppl's butt if i get into nursing.
haha. sapa yg guilty hah...... hahaks

fer now, prelims two lorr. i wanna give up on my science. PHYSICS esp. eeeeyerr. geli seh i look at the questions. i can cry. hahaks. wad resistance and stuffs. haha. eeee. just not my type ahh. no science student. hahaks. k laa. i tink i wanna rest and sleep before my tuition starts at two.

somebody says he has been thinking of me.
he says he's addicted to me.
muahahaa.
actually, i;ve been thinking abt him too.
i just wont wanna admit it.
finally, i've admit it.
i wont say that ur sick anymore k?
hehee.
you know how you are.
hehehee.

*throatness.*

*ehemmm.* clears throat. haha.. i'm so tired. sleepy. stressed up..
today, woke up. my throat was super bad.. mama said not to go to school. but i had to go. i wanted to study in a condusive environment. haha. wadever fana wadever.. reached school at 6.30am.. and bought kueh pau. haha. so niceee. been craving fer that since last week.

chatted with my bestie. caught up with old times. haha. yana came. went up to hall. normal routine. read my physics stuffs. there were only ten ppl in class cos daa rest retook their malay prelims exams. and NO TEACHER. haha. i practiced on my physics for 4 hours. it made me bonkers. we were given ahmad ibrahim, yishun and hongkah paper to do. SCIENCES. yucks. suma skola takmu kalah seh set paper. haha. standard.

i couldnt do daa physics. soo stressed up. haha. went to toilet. i wont tell u what i do there. haha. crap fana crap..RECESS time. weee` ate chicken chop. a chicken burger and plain water. today i got big appetite. haha.. i eat alot laaa. hahaks. my friends were commenting on how sick i was. haha. red eyes. yada yada...then it was geog. sat with feeqa at daa front. haha. i focused. haha. but still, fooling around with feeqa. we were making fun of daa word 'nyeeeeeee' hahaks. everytime muhaimin says someting, we would say that and make him irritated. ahhaks.

after school, went home and SLEEP. haha. one hr. then farah called. i got doctor's appointment. at last i went. so ppl, dont say fana degil . hehee.. doctor said i had throat infection. and its forming. luckily i came early. haha. got headache and slight fever which comes and goes. i'm not allowed to drink gassy drinks. french fries. orange juice and fried food. BUMMER. eeeyerr. how to live. hahaks. i want those stuffs. esp chocolates. haha. TEMPTATIONS. blekkk.

then, i reached home. tried to open my can of mushroom but cannot open. hehehe. i lapar already. can eat porridge only. farah said that i overworked. so must rest. TODAY I PROMISE I WONT STUDY. haha. study break. hahaks. okela. i gtg now. wanna take my medicine and rest fer today.

till then.
dini, get well soon.
physics next time pon kau bley ajar aku k?
takecare of yourself .
nanti monday aku tak puasa, kau bleh pelok aku k.
hehehe.

takecareness.
dont ferget to tag.


Bila kau jauh terasa sunyi
Resah gelisah sepanjang hari
Seandainya kau ada di sisi
Bahagianya hidupku ini

Kali pertama ku kenal cinta
Baruku sedar ertinya rindu
Jiwa gelora mimpi mengusik
Semakin rindu semakin asyik

-amelina.

* sickk.

hurr hurr. prelims english over. should i celebrate? haha. nehh. i dont think i would do well anyway. hahaks. studied fer summary and format last night. i wont wanna expect anything.. heheks. so i will concentrate on other subjects.
i'm down with a really bad throat.
so painful. urggh.

i woke up at 4am to sahur. not reallly 4 am.
haha. 4.45am.. i kept delaying my time. haha..
went to kitchen. i was so lazy to even fry and egg. haha.
really sleepy sehh. aiyo yo...so just got myself peanut butter bread.
my favourite. hahaks.

then, went back and sleep.
nervousness fer exams. hahaks.
woke up at 5.30.. siap siap. got more time to manage my hair.
hehehe. weee. reached school slacked. read sum formats. bla bla.

exam started. attempted question one.
it was abt childhood which results in something that surprises you or sth.
i wrote abt a love story. haha. wadever fana.
aku kemarok cinta. hahaks. recess, slacked in class with yana.
so nice to have ppl fasting with you.
cuma nawi, a lot of temptations gilerrrr..
hahaks.

english paper 2 was a killer.
aiyah donno la. hahaks.
then came home.
lalala** i'm bored.
so i plan to study my sciences today.
maths
and accounts.

*bang bang bang.
whose dead?
me* hehehee.

8.30pm.
i'm bored.
just did my physics radioactivity and temp.
left light and thermal energy.
and i had to lose my physics answer booklet laaa.
damn ness. haha.

i had zinger meal fer buka.
haha.alhamdulilah. .
then solat.
prayed to god.
abt my family.
myself.
my grrlies.
and him. haha.
i prayed god would enlighten his heart.
to study and do well. haha.
wont tell you who.
hahhaa.

( belaian mu.)

in daa morning, mama woke me up saying that she's going to work. she pesaned to wake up. haha. i just salam her with my eyes semi opened. i was super tired. i slept fer half an hour more when my sister woke me up. hahaks. went to siap siap. then fone rang. it was muhaimin. he wanted me to help him angkat benda DNT. so went to his house and went off to school after that. his mom was so cute. hahaks.

reached school at 9am. drank white milk. and assembled in the AVA room. then, we were directed to the science labs. when we were outside the lab, we saw a glass block. then i was like ' oh shit' i look and feeqa and i screamed to her. ' FEEQAAAAA. AKU TAK TAU BUAT'. everyone was so happy cos they knew how to do it. hahaks. i was struggling with daa physics stuffs. like shit.. struggled. hahaks. i repeat. muka struggled. crammped up. hahaks.

chemistry, titration. hahaks. wadeverness. never learn oso. but i wrote neutralisation reaction. hahaks. i got pale pink ppt. so nice. hahaks. i was admiring daa colour. haha. i dint hear any pop sound when there was supposed to be pop sound. hahaks. something wrong with my ear. haha. and they asked to calculate concentration? wadever. teacher havent cover yet. i suspect it is a pure chem paper. urghh.

yana and farah waited fer me. although they were in shift one and ended early. went to eat at long john silvers. hmm.. then we were discussing abt something which happened in their science lab.. pitiful incident. then, we talked abt old times back in sec3. remembered when cikgu nurul sent me, yana and daa rest of daa malay class out. stand at one corner and must do frog jump all daa way to daa other end of daa building. haha. yana fell on her knees. i laughed at her. haha. it was embrassing. but, those were daa days. haha. she will like scream ' LOMPAT KATAK' hahaks. eeee. paiseh giler. haha.

then , went home. i'm so tired. feel like sleeping. but have to study my english. tmw is english prelims already. must must get good grades. i feel like going out on friday.... go and rileks my mind. hmm. i planned my study programme fer this two weeks already. haha. i got lesser topics to cover. but, i have to admit, i'm really tired. really tired.
wanna break downn already. feel like giving up when it is already ending.

urghhh. be strong. thats what kept me going.
i'm not sure if i want to go to JC anymore.
abdullah said was rite. i should follow my dreams.
dreams to go to nanyang poly. and pursue in nursing.
maybe? hmm.

prelims two is very important to me.
very very important.
i screwed my prelim one.
2 o lvl passes. 34 points.
haha. ROJAK.
now, i want 6 o lvl passes 15 points. haha.
wadever fana.
wadever.
i'm never gonna make it am i?

nieways, i heard sum stuffs abt him.
i saw him wearing my watch and shirt.
wadever. and i heard he is daa same.
treating grrls daa same way.
haiz. i cant say anyting. i just don want him to hurt his grrl
daa way he treated me. i hope i hope..
i dont feel anything for him.
a year of relationship. so what?
i was treated like dirt.
i remember how i used to worry abt him.
and cry in daa school toilet. haha.
but, i'm glad things ended and we went our separate ways.
if not, i dunno how long would i be suffering. haha.
i've forgotten abt him long ago..
just that, after what i heard, flashbacks came to my mind.
haha. wadever fana. i'm happier now. so much happier.
no more slitting of wrists.
nothing.. no worries. * weeeee.*

and ppl, mug now .
exams are near.
good luck fer all.
search fer boyfriends or grrlfriends after o's.
haha.

practicals.

*YAWNS* ITS only 8.20 pm . and i'm sleepy already. basically, i didnt have sufficient sleep last night. i got a major stomach ache.. so painful. drank milk, no avail . still daa same lorr. woke up at 2am last nite. couldnt sleep. really felt i wanted somebody at that moment. so i just sat on my bed and sat. PATHETIC. hahaks. feel like sms-ing ppl. but it was 2am. haha.

woke up super late. 6.15 am. urgghh. haha. so was rushing.. rambot tidak diurus giler. hahaks.. just rushed out of daa house. bag not packed. uhh. wadever. i'm a messy grrl. hahaks.. reached school and got bitten by two mosquitos at my leg. so i kept scratching. hahaks. yana didnt come today. i miss her seh.. miss her craps. hahaks. i'll see her tmw. yeahness. sayang liyana. imagine two ppl who completely hate each other last time, now, close buddies. and i appreaciate everyting. everymoment. i loveee herrr.

physics, did MCQ questions. aiyoness. so terok and rabak sehh. 7/20. hahaks. EEE. PHYSICS. nehhhnehh. not my type. hahaks. me and feeqa were like playing around in class. we talked abt sum stuffs. and i sang to her " ku impikan belaianmu kasih...lalala* till she got irritated. hahaks. english, whole class ran away from miss teo. hahaks. =P. including me. hahaks. yada yada...

RECESS. OH NOO. nightmare. hahaks. i ate nasi and sambal goreng. yummy... it was my recess. lunch and dinner fer today. three in one. hehee. then, me , arati and farah were walking up daa stairs.. and we saw a HUGE CROWD. around daa stairs smiling at us. so we were wondering. whats with these ppl. ALL OF A SUDDEN. " BOO!". immediate reactions of us, " AHHHHHHHHH". it was planned. we had been ' PUNKED.' many ppl laughed at us. SERIOUSLY PAISEHNESSS... hahaks.. eeee. geram sehhh.

when masok class, ppl laughed. hahaks. wadever then i started to laugh. it was funny. especially on how we screamed. hahaks. IT WAS LOUD. ppl from daa 6th storey could hear us. hahaks.enough of laughter, accounts. joined table with zhenjun. hahaks. we were forcing him to go fer prom. hahaks. step malu konon dier. hahaks.. he's so funny. hahaks.. lunch and had accounts again. it was boring. seriously boring.

we complimented on zhenjun's look. haha. we called him hamtaro and this cartoon character. being as cute as he is, he will always laugh. hahaks. with his eyes semi opened. hahaks. and he taught me accounts. hehee. bestness. went home and bought myself chocolates. hahaks. so chocolatey deprived. hahaks. my fav words fer daa past days was ' SEXUALLY DEPRIVED' hahaks. DOUBLE MEANING THERE.hahaks.

just finished revising my anions and cations plus did one english comprehension. hahaks. gonna do my maths after this..i'm tired.. but, gotta force and work. if not, things wont get done. hahaks.. tmw is my practicals. afraid la. but then, i have to face my fears. hmm.. tmw go back at eleven thirty. and can wake up late. cos i'm in shift two. hahaks. wee~ just afraid i cant wake up cos mama and everyone would already have gone off by then. so anyoneeee. puhleeezz buzz me at abt seven. i'll appreaciate it. cos my alarm oso siaoness. hahaks.

k laaa. wanna go do maths.
wish me luck fer tmw.
i hope no mishaps will happen.
and pray my stomach will get better
take care.

* miss reality*
i miss you.

* saket perotnyer.*

ouchhy ouch ouch. just regained from a bad stomach ache.. actually, it still hurts laa. ahaks. this is what i get for not eating properly for the last few days. hahaks. YES YES. FANA DEGIL. i know i know. hahaks. kedegilan membawa padah. hmm. my mom dunno abt daa stomachaches. no use telling her i guess.. i'll just bare with it.. heheee.

yesterday, slept at eleven. so boring. woke up at 6am today. considered lateness. hahaks. msged my darling liyana and she was lazy to go to school. well, so was i. so deprived. hahaks. SHE LOVES ME SOO MUCH that she agreed to go to school. kekeke. thanks grrl. i love you to bits.
mama tegor me. ask bout my skirt. wadeverness.. pagi pagi buta tanya pasal skirt. eeee. binget. hahaks. but just kept quiet.

first to third period was FREE period for me. hahaks. basically, i did my accounts and stuff. and MT CLASS, me, dini and farah and sat .. DO SOMETHING. hehee. FUN KAN KAN KAN? heheks. shh. takmu bilang orang ah. aku paiseh sehh. hahaks. STEAMBOAT . hahaks.

then got english with mrs soo. i wasnt paying attention and was invited to do sth on daa board. yada yada. and she called my name 4 times. hahaks. SEE. I WAS DREAMING. hahaks. cannot blame me. something on my mind. hahaks. after that, geog. given 3 maps to do. i;ll just go bonkers.. hehehe. then sat and talk to yana. i let out everyting. my probs at home and stuffs. share secrets. i almost cried when i told her. .. heee. thanks fer listening my dear yana. sayang u so much . hahaks.

aisha was ' DEAR-ING' me daa whole day. YER SAYANG. aku mintak maaf banyak banyak. kol satu pagi aku msg kau yg tak senonoh. hahaks.. sorry. it wasnt meant fer you . hehee. maaf laa. aku pon paiseh sendirik seh. hehe. tapi, aku maseh sayangkan kau. bluekz! hahaks.
did i tell you i was sexually assulted today? hahaks.
lame lame. hahaks.

oh no. stomach ache is back.
so painful.
very saket leh.

today, did maps, english and june math paper.
it was okey la.. not bad.
im bored
boo.

* i've been dreaming of you everyday.
it haunts me.
hahaks.
wadeverness.
he wont know.
cos i wont tell him.
hahaks.
bluekz.*

* i was bored.* haha.*


hmm . its 3pm. so fast. and i'm feeling okay. no more emo-ing. yeahness.. i feel better. so much better. i've cleared my mind. thank god.. i ate my dinner at one am. hahaks. giler. i asked my sis to teman me to daa kitchen. haha. and she was strumming the gitar.. * soo noisy* yada yada. slept at two am. couldnt sleep. haha. so that i wouldnt look old in daa future, sleeping is important. hahaks.

woke up at 8 am today. yipeee. earliness. pesan mama to buy fer me hotcakes. yummy nice nice. but must share with my sis.! hmmph! hahaks. made myself coffee. and start working on my stuffs. first up was geography. hahaks. i loveee geog. dunno why. did on development and wet rice.. my notes are colourful. its purple and pink. bluekz! haha. mama taught me map reading just now. it was okay. i put daa unhappiness aside. weee~ i'm no more a sad person. i must be a happy person. haha. ya riteee.~

from ten all the way till 2pm i did geog . then did my social studies on industralisation. gonna continue daa source based layter and i plan to do locus and transformation. plus accounts on bad debts and adjustments. hahaks. after that, i plan to free myself daa whole night. iron my uniform and get ready fer school tmw.. this week alone, there are 2 exams. wednesday, practical. i need to revise my anions and cations. and thursday, english exams. hmm. MY SUMMARY. COMPRE. walauuuu. haha.

i;ll take things slow from now on. i wont stress myself too much.
alryte? haha. slowly slowly. i'm hungry. I SHOULD EAT. if not, ppl scold me ahh.
say i degil . haha. *hints* hmm.
i'll be okay till o levels end.
i promise. i promise.

i wish you guys all daa best fer exams.
dont study to hard.
or u'll end up breaking down like me.
i've regained myself.
i'll do whats best for myself.

i love everyone around me.
i love myself.
just like everyone else.
therefore, i'm named. MISS REALITY.*
hahaa.

takecare guys.
happy mugging fer prelims.
lots of love,
fanaaaa.

* stressnesss.*

* i just wanna screeaaaaammmmm.* urrrggghhhhhhhh.
hahaks. weee . i feel lighter. hahaks. light as a lighted splinter. hahaks. = HYDROGEN. haha.
wadda hell. hmm. i'm tired. my brain is stopping. no productivity anymore. i guess its because of oxygen cannot enter my blood. due to too much excessive information. hahaks. CHEMISTRY. wadeverness. haha.

*yawns.* its only 2.50pm and i'm sleepy. i feel like sleeping. ahaks. nooo. cannot. must push harderrr. urrrggggg. haha. was so stressedup last night cos of my mother. so stressness. haha. slept at 3 plus. again, on my table. hahaks.. soo tired already.. luckily, ionic bond msged me at 4 am. what were u doing so early ah?? hahaks. and i went back to sleep after that. my waist and neck hurts like crazy. hahaks.

i woke up at 9 am today. considered late fer me. started studying again. SCIENCE. from TEN all the way till 2.30PM. my mind really going crazy. formulaes going on. bla bla bla. i recap my physics again. its my 4th time recaping. i did on kinematics, dynamics, moments, mass, density and volume and workdone. yada yada yada. and fer chemistry, i did my particle theory, macromolecules which i have a hard time doing and also, atmostphere. hmm. my brain is worn out. due to friction. haha. see. whats wrong with me. i'm crapping so much.

mum and dad went to malaysia. thank god i dint follow. if not, my eardrums will BURST. FANAA. ASL KAU TAK BLAJA. yada yada yada. hahas.. i'm gonna continue fer another 5 hours doing my maths. hahaks. a KILLER SUBJECT. i feel like killing MATHS. hahaks. then another 3HRS doing accounts. hahaks. and at 2 AM, do my HUMANITIES.. i'm down with selesema again. i keep getting sick and i dunno why. i seldom have the appetite to eat anymore. i eat only twice or sometimes, once a day. my mom is killing me. slowly chopping me into pieces. hahaks.

monday, school reopens. a new chapter of my life begins. TERM 4. wednesday, science practical. hope i wont screw anything up.. hope the dropper wont drop into the testube and hope the bunsen flame would light up.. god willing.. i'm so stressed at home that i wish i dont have to be at home.. i would just cry.. thats all i can afford to do.
I KNOW EXAMS IS AROUND DAA CORNER.
MAMA... PUHLEEZ. TRY AND UNDERSTAND ME.
I'M TRYING MAMA.
I CANT BE AS GOOD AS KAKAK.
I KNOW THAT. YOU KNOW THAT.
ALL I NEED IS YOUR SUPPORT MA..

i wish i could say it to her.. i cant. i cant.. look at the bright side, i have ppl around me. my grrlfriends, my bestfriends. supporting me in whatever things that i do. i really appreaciate these ppl. they make my life worth living. not forgetting my ionic bond, who always have to hear my complains. heheh. sowiieee horr. and abdullah pesan me " air mata tu bukan murah" hahaks. i have to keep that in mind.

k laa. wanna do maths.
anything just buzz my fone k.
i wanna talk to ppl.
hahaks.
love ya ppl to bits.
THANK YOU EVERYONE.
I LOVE YOU ALL.
MUAH MUAH MUAH.***
miss reality**

" kemana arah cintamu sayang?
resahku tak engkau hiraukan
diriku engkau lupakan"
-exist dalam kenangan.

*PART TWO.*

pictures we took in shcool last few days. hahaa.


i know we are cute. haha.




oouuhh. its already eight thirty? haha. so fast time fly today. basically, today, i went out. yipeee. hahaks. see. something;'s wrong with me. screw loose already haha.woke up at eight in daa morning. when mom stopped me . she lectured me. bla bla bla. she said i hafta be serious in my studies. must concentrate. must sacrifice. bla bla bla. i was closing my eyes when she said that. hahaks.. * sleepyness.*

did my properties of circles from 8.30 to 9.30. wahh. daa properties all so chim seh. cyclic quadiletral, angle of the same segment. wad semicircle. hahaks. yada yada yada. then mama asked to siap siap. nak belanja makan burger king. yipeeness. went to westmall and eat. plus my orange juice. early in daa morning. hahaks. saket perot.. after that, she lecture pasal belajar lagik. aduh. saket. sungguh menyakitkan. hahaks.

at abt eleven, i left and met yana at yewtee. hahaks. took daa train to orchard. it took us 45minutes.. so longg. boo hoo. went by red line. haha. it passed woodlands. so many stops. haha. then we chat and laughed daa whole way. at last, we reached orchard. hahaks. went to far east and teman yana makan. i ate my chocolate pie. yummy. delicious.. walked around. then saw a sale of skirts and stuff.. we saw 10 dollars. and we went to check it out. then we said. patot la ten dollars. quality. fulamak. hahaks. walk walk. then she bought nail polish. then, i bumped into my mom. haa.. i asked her fer extra duit. hehe. so she gave me laaa.



bought my mrs fields cookie. yummy. yumm yumm. hahaks. went to lucky plaza mcdee. and painted nails. hahaks. really bored. hmm. then snap some pics lorr. laugh laugh. and maade our way to bugis. we found daa ice skating place. haha. but verry expensive. 20 bucks fer 2 ppl. fer holiday. if not holiday, its 32 dollars. EXPENSIVE. superduper mahal. took 960 back to bkt panjang and took LRT baq to cck.




reached home at 4.30pm. haha. fast eh. if not, i'll be at city hall again. admiring beauty. hahaks. bla bla bla..nehh nehh nehh. hahaks. reached home, did my chemistry. rate of reactions. hahaks. not as tough as i thought laa. okey okey la. hahaks. then did yr 2000 science JUNE PAPER. OH gawd. MY PHYSICS. eeeee! bingetttt. ahahks. i hate science anyway. then continued to do my darling favourite, CIRCLES. one major headache. eeee. oh no HARTT ACHE. haha. did a lil bit of trigonometry. and other school paper. and its killing me. hahaks. it may not be alot, but i stumble and make careless mistakes. ALOT. hmph. FANA IS CARELESS. NEHH NEHH. hahaks.


TinyPic.com">
mom keeps nagging at me. and its ssoo unbearable.
my eardrums wanna burst.
20khz already lor.
hahaks. crazy. hmmph.
so boring. lalala**
i feel like singing.
" CEPAT BENAR ENGKAU PERGI.
HUJAN MASIH BELUM BERHENTI.
APA KAH BENAR SOALAN KU TADI?
HATIMU TERUSIK KINI.

SEBAGAI KEKASIHMU,
LAYAK AKU BERTANYA.
SEKUAT MANA CINTAMU.
TIADAKAH INSAN LAIN DI HATIMU?
SELAINKU.

SAAAAYAANNNGGG.
BUKANNYA SEHARI DUA.
PERCINTAAN KITA INI.
JANJI PUN SUDAH DIPATERI.
SAAAYAANGG JANGAN IKUT PERASAAN.
MARAH JANGAN DISIMPAN.
KU HANYA INGIN MENDUGA DAN KINI.
AKU TAHU SATU KEKASIHMU.
HANYAA AKUUU."



hahaks
lovee dat song.
weee
i'll update soon.
can mama stoopppp bugging me to study.
urggghh
haha

*masih terserlah ayumu.*

good morningg peopleeeee. its a bright thursday. haha. today, i woke up at 8 plus. and thats quite late fer me. i dont usually wake up that latee. haha. NO SCHOOL today . at last, can rest fer quite a bit. no plans fer going out today. in fact, i'm cashless. haha. ez link oso no money. sigh sigh.

mom left fer work early in daa morning. she would only be home at 6 plus. my dad's working and my sis is out as usual. its left with me alone at home. so boriinggg. seriously. i plan to study today but i feel so lazy today. daa devils are poking me and saying to me dont study. haha. english homework is piling up my table. so many comprehensions. i can go bonkers. uhhh.


sumtimes, i feel like NOT STAYING in singapore. education is so important here. yaya. i know it is to have skilled workforce fer daa 21st century and to sustain singapore's development. *boring* haha. i wish i could study in australia. life is less stressful there. here, everything is about money. so materialistic. i'm sick of studying. i'm sick. i'm sick of being compared with people whom are already sucessful. i hate it too. i feel so down and low. with some ppl saying " oh, your sis is so smart" and like wad daa heck. they dont even notice my presence. i know i'm not as smart as her. at least, i'm trying so hard. if my parents cant see that, i would be left speechless. and there would only be one word to describe me. DUMB.

i have my dreams too. i'm human. i know i'm not perfect.. who doesnt wanna do well ? everyone does. everyone have their own dreams and desires. i dream to be a nurse specialising in children's illnesses. to be specific, a paedaetriction. mum said that it is not a good job. i dont know who to rely on anymore. i feel so alone. so alone. nobody to support me.. no encouragement.. i'm trying hard. i'm trying. i'm trying. but right now, i dont know what i want anymore. what JC? what POLY? NOTHING. i think i cant even make it.. a lil support fer me would do me good..

i feel like giving up. i feel like giving up. i feel like giving up. somebody, puhleez save me. *it hurts when they disapprove all along.*
pheww. i let out everything. at last.
i feel better. hahaha.
fana's okey. i promise.

i'm addicted to daa song " masih terserlah ayumu" by exist.
superr niceeeee. ahaa.
" sayang, bukannya sehari dua. percintaan kita ini,
janji pun sudah dipateri.
sayang, jangan ikut perasaan.
marah jangan disimpan.
ku hanya ingin menduga dan kini..
aku tahu satu kekasihmu.
hanya aku. "- exist. till then,
i'm off. waiting fer somebody to save me.
i wonder. i wonder. hahaa.
*miss reality*

*yawnnnssss.*

school ended at 2pm today.. verry tiring. i studied from 8pm last night. did my POA siglap paper. aduhh. cannot balance account.frustrating. but ended up, i still got a B4. hahaks. but its only a trial. then at 10pm did physics.. magnetism. i almost pulled my hair while doing it. as i enjoyed the night breeze. look up to daa sky. and saw 2 stars again.. then did my physics. hahaks. i still cannot get the magnetic stuffs. bleeehh. eee. i hate physics. i learnt that a core electromagnet is iron. haha. at least, i learnt something. haha.

studied till one am. then went online. teman my sis belajar her literature on the other computer. chatted with my greaat ionic bond. who was busy editing his video. haha. i tink, if he had continued to chat with me, he wont finish his work. haha. he'll message me when he's done. haha. so, i continued doing my maths paper. bedok south. 24/60. haha. not bad. hahaks. first time i get over 20 plus. haha. can do even better. chatted with ionic bond till2.30 plus. his laughter so cute seh. haha. long time i never hear . hehe. only we dint nehh about. haha.

afterthat, i went to my study table and read my notes. then.. jeng jeng jeng. tertido. haha. on daa table. in daa morning, my neck hurts like crazy. haha. and i was sleeping while holding a pen. haha. so burok. hehee. but i had a fun time staying up mugging and chatting with my ion. haha. woke up at 6.00am. siap siap. meeting yana and farah. go school . LESSONS. bug me. haha.

ate brownie yana brought and peanut butter. hehee. it kept me awake fer a while.. social studies class at 8.30am. did our 6essays plan out. haha. it was okey. in fact, me and yana and feeqa were taking pics at daa back. haha. fooling around. but i was paying attention. i think? haha.. did essay on good govenance. break time, sat in class with yana and feeqa. me and feeqa sang " masih terserlah ayumu" hahaks. so funny. and we actually recorded it. but, i am not letting anybody hear . hahaks. it might spoil ur eardrums. haha.

chemistry started at 11.30am. starting to get sleepy already. yawn yawn. did science practical. year 2002. it was okey. AGAIN. I WAS CARELESS. dint read instructions properly. i am so gonna screw my practical exams. hahaks. i'm a careless person who will get paniced easily. haha. and when i panic my whole face will turn blank. and really BLANK. shocking state. hahaks. i'm learning how to light a bunsen burner. haha. i hate to burn chemicals. later testube drop. haha. and my dropper got stucked in the testube. hahaks. fun fun fun. so i dint sleep. haha.

after that, did on mole concept. and i hate it. haha. so hard. calculate here and there. eee. hate it. lucky yana was helping me seh. if not. aiyo yo. i was struggling. haha. see. i hate science. cannot apply. silly me. hmm. at 2pm, classes ended. so tired. my whole body aching. haha. me and yana proceeded to daa canteen. wait fer my bestie farah. hmm. then we talked. * grins.* abt her dad's death. which i really pity her. after she told her story, i almost cried. but i held her hand and said.. its life .. then we talked abt life after marriage. haha. so funny. SERIOUSLY funny. haha.
talked abt ehem and the ehem. haha. ask me what issit. hahaa.

* dreams.* haha. pass my o's. and pass well. get a boyfriend. haha. at least after the o's. hmm. then go JC. then university. start to work. get car license. i want a beetle car. haha. get married at 24. haha. i tink? hmm. wish wish . wouldnt it be nice to have somebody to love and to hold. and have a relationship which would last for ten years and then, get married. LOVELY. * but neh. MIRACLES DONT HAPPEN TO ME. haha.

i tink i wanna eat and rest.
then start mugging again tonight.
[*psst.i posted that pic fer fun. haha. *boring*]
abdullah said i look like mak mak summore.
haha. makcik jual sayur kan? hehee.
takecare ya'll.
muah muah muah.***

*baq.

*yawns* tiring day giler..hahaa. whole day. study. SCHOOL. bummer.. slept at 2am last nite. couldnt sleep. . hydrochloric acid really reacting on my stomach. so painful seh. then toss here and there. and my sis SNORE. oh my god. lost my mood to sleep. haha.. wokeup at 5.45am. wee. early. cos i cannot sleep already. hehee.

siap siap to meet yana and farah. go eat at mcdee. was waiting fer dini. but then, she couldnt come. its okey dear.. next time okey? heee. hmm. ate at mcdee cck. ordered hotcakes meal. yummy. so niceeee.. still got time to joke around seh. hahaks. still early.reached school. and then maths. 8am to ten am. did my junyuan paper2. 24/88. haha. at least something. hehee.

next, chem. did practical. haha. i am soo gonna fail practical exams seh. haha. i burnt my hand. so pain. haha. yana paniced and asked me to wash under running water. haha. i dint. DEGIL . haha. now, its hurting. haha. . i must learn to read instructions. haha..geog started at 1.30 ended at 4.30. haha. but it was okey. learnt to read maps. ahaa. i hate map reading. eee. benci.

me and yana are currently pissed.
cos of something.
hahaa. boo.
ask me if u wanna knw. kekkee.
k laaa.
update soon.

nieways.. SOFIAAAA.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
HAPPY SIXTEENING.
hehee.

i've cleared my mirror.
no more his name.
he's gone.
i have forgotten all abt him.
all this happens fer a reason.
and i'm glad.
things ended up this way.
=) *peace*

*school*

haha. giler.


hey ppl. just came baq frm school. setengah mati seh nari. can dieeee. urghh. tiring seh. fasting lagi. masyallah. my throat feels like sandpaper haha. i woke up at 5am to eat sahur. i dint know what to eat. haha. so, i fried an egg. and daa egg. DISTORTED. hahaks. daa oil was splattering. and of course, i was screaming.. hahaks. i cant even cook a decent egg.. whoever marries me will have to eat my horrible cooking. anyone wanna try? kekeke..

haha. egg. bleeehh.

woke up at 6.30am when i was supposed to meet farah at 7am. hahaks. see. i'm bad at timing. nobody kejot summore. tink i robot ah. haha. no alarm waddd..hmm..morning got accounts class. joined table with zhenjun.. then talked abt sum stuffs. *ehem ehem* hahaks. i'm sick. big friendly giant eh? hehe. 1hr accounts then break all daa way till 10.30. got maths. that one oso idint pay attention. hahaks. lack of focus. i dunno why.

next, english. DEAD SEH. we were checking friendster and gg other websites. hehee. all of us are bad. hehee..ended at 4.30. did comprehension. boo. boring . then met farah at daa canteen lorr. she ended already. went back with arayi and dini and farah. hehe. best best. i feel regretful as i dint go fer doctor;s appointment. my stomach's really painful now. seriously painful. gawdddd. if i not lazy, tmw i go doctor.
really afraid cos i feel my stomach walls are thinning.
biting off slowly.
pray that nth happens to me aite.
i wish i wish...
wishy list.eeehee.
CREATIVEEEEE.
NGAGEEEE.

**i loveee him.**

hello.. its raining.. i'm feeling cold and numb. i'm running a fever.. uh.. wadever. nobody cares. haha..currently listening to siapa di hatimu by my ionic bonder.. its being played repeatedly. and i've cried repeatedly as well.. the song brought so much meaning.. and its sang by..jeng jeng jeng. haha. just came back from org kahwin.. tired. mama forced me to wear kebaya when i wanted to wear baju kurung. she say like minah kampung. haha. mepek kan. so i had to follow what she say. yada yada yada..tomorrow, theres school early morning sehhh. and i'll be fasting tmw. bet i'll look like a zombieeee. hahaks.. ACCOUNTS in daa morning. then, maths till late afternoon. and late afternoon, there is ENGLISH. 2 HOURS. till 4pm. wahhh. can dieee sehh. i was drenched in daa rain on saturday.. so, i caught running nose one major headache and now, fever. waahh. i never felt better. haha. only if there was somebody taking care of me right now. hmm.just now, daa pelamin was purrpleee colour. i likeeeeee. hahaks. then excited. hahaks. my sis went to study at starbucks with her "fren". lalalaa** september holidays, monday, tuesday, wednesday booked in school. hahaks. got classes. i'm free on thursday and friday. I PLAN TO KELUARRR. weee. of course seh. haha. i wanna go city hall and watch stars.. long time i dint do that. anyone wanna follow meehh?? hmm..emo sekejap. hahaks.. plan to enjoy and rileks my mind. maybe to daa airport perhaps? hmm. " i wish i could tell you how i feel. a feeling which felt so real. i feel daa same way about you. if only, u know.... thats so true"
if only you know..
if only you know..
if only you know..

*funfairr.*

TODAY. SATURDAY. SCHOOL CARNIVAL.
hahaks. woke up at 7am. mama woke me up. wah. she actually woke me up.
haha. checked my fone. ONE MESSAGE RECEIVED. i was shocked cos i dint hear any sound seh. hahaks. was too tired. zonked giler. it was suhweet abdullah with his suhweet greeting message. at 4.25am. hahaks. i tink he's too sick to sleep. kesian dierr. get well soon ionic bond. =)

got ready and stuff. met farah at 8.30am. bus 307 was infested with teckwhyesec pupils. its like a school bus seh. haha. reached school. assembled. and off we are to play games and buy food. its boring. seriously. nothing seh. spent time settling ishaa's pwob. hahaks. all of us stood by her. we hart her loads. hmm. then, it was treasure hunt time. we signed up hahaks. actually, there are 8 of us in a team. then too many people. so, we had to split. TEAM 1- FARAH, QEELA, BENYAMIN, WANIE. TEAM 2- ME, DINI AND IKA. we had great fun. finding clues around daa school. exciting seh. hahaks. this game bonded us futhur. as grrlfriends. except fer ben. haha.

our team dint win. but, GREAT TEAMSPIRIT. we completed daa race sumhow. haha. then got home HEINZ HAMPER. hahaks. i took daa baked beans. i loveee baked beans. gave each other hugs. aww. see. thats why i love them alot. went to westmall to eat mcdonalds. we were drenched. basah giler. and now, i am having side effects. headache and running nose. hahaks. alah dondang. mama just collected daa baju raya today. its NOTT NICEEEE. eeee. hahaks. its green. i love green. hahaks. anyone wanna team up and wear green? hehee. booo.

i'm bored. and down with headache. got a feeling i am gonna get sick. hahaks. head spinning like washing machine seh. and forehead hot already.. means kan. i got fever. hahaks. but i feel nothing. hehe. i tink i wanna rest now.. very tired and sick. uhh. tissues are gonna be my bestfriend. hahaks.

THANKS TO ALL WHO MADE ME LAUGH LIKE MAD TODAY.
DINI, FARAH, IKA, ISHA, FEEQA, QEELA, WANIE
HARRT YOU GUYS.
YOU GUYS MADE MY DAY.

*left*

BOO. i'm back. hahaks. soo tired. thank god no extra lessons. today, woke up at 5.15 for sahur. NO ALARM. hahaks. kalang kabut eat maggi mee. and my throat is drying up already. boo. after that, get ready fer school. checked handphone. NO MESSAGES NO MISSED CALLS. got used to it already. hehee. first period was english. went to computer lab. i wasnt paying attention actually. haha. my mind couldnt focus today.

next, was maths.. LAGI TAK CONCENTRATE. i dint bring my spectacles.. so i couldnt see a thing on daa board. hahaks. ferget laaa. blame it on old age. hhaa. me, feeqa and yana spent daa whole 1 hour polishing our nails. laughing and story2. hahaks. it was FUN. then, mother tongue, sat outside library. did chemistry papers from yishun sec and ahmad ibrahim sec. yishun nya paper memang nak bunuh org. abdullah nya skolaaa la ni.. hahaks. super difficult. at least, i try to balance my equation. and i bugged feeqa to teach me till i get it correct.hahaks.

RECESS. dint go canteen. NOT TEMPTED TO EAT. iman mesti kuat. haha..last period, social studies. again, didnt listen. assignment with teacher. when daa rest havent hand it. hahaks. kiasuness. but, it pays to be a lil kiasu. haha. slacked and talked with feeqa and yanaa. laugh and giggle. hahaks. thats what we always do. after that. went home straight. hahaks. plan to study later till buka time.

but devils are telling me to sleep. hahaks. biadap. haha. if i sleep, i got no alarm. unless somebody wake me up at 4. haa. mom's not home. dad's werking. aloneee. booo. boring seh.
wanna chat on daa fonee. cos i super bored. and i'm watching a walk to remember. hahaks. i'm tahaning my tears cos i cannot cry. fasting mahh. she's singing only hope. cant wait when shes gonna kiss shane west. boo MELT . hahaks.

k laaa. gtg watch daa movie.
slamat berbukaaa.
sayang sumernyaaa.

" you are now saying goodbye.
you're leaving...
this world is unjust, full of weavings.
i'm left all alone.
im trying hard to be somebody.
too bad. it dint work.
now, i am left with NOBODY.
can somebody puhleeezz savee me?

*FREAKING PSYCO.*

" lalala blow. lalalala blow." haha. parking lot pimps. i lovee daaa song..today is a holiday. cos its teachers day. haha. HAPPY TEACHERS DAY.
hmm. today, i woke up at 8am. checked my fone. NO MISSED CALLS. NO MESSAGES RECEIVED. took a bath and started to study. sat did my 8 ESSAYS OF SOCIAL STUDIES PLANNING. haha. it was alryte. not as bad as i thought it would be. haha. then, mama cooked macaroni soup. yummy. ate with sis. she seem to be sharing stuffs that she never used to.. after her break up, she seem rather WEIRD.* after eating, i started doing my POA. st gabriel's paper. quite difficult. haha. HATE ACCOUNts. TOO many formats and theory. I AM NEVER GONNA BE AN ACCOUNTANT. booo! haha..it was about 1 pm at that time. i wanted to sleep but got no alarm. so FORGET ABT SLEEPING. cos i wont wake up. haha. did my organic chem notes and ten year series. FUELS, ALKANES, ALKENES, ALCOHOLS AND CARBOXYLLIC ACIDS. i leave out MACROMOLECULES. cos i superr hate it. haha. bloody polymer.
i'm worried for PHYSICS. to be specific, SCIENCE. i hate it. its unlike combined humanties, a subject which i loveee. science is applying knowledge and i hate it. haha. ELECTRICITY is killing me. haha. resistors laa. bla bla.. hate hate hate. haha. and accounts. aiyo. big headache. hahaaks.
next week holidays. strictly school seh. no holiday langsung. i'll study fer PRELIM II. hoping to get below 20 pts fer L1R5. which is IMPOSSIBLE. but hey. IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING. hahaks. so, i cant giveee up now. although there are many times that i wanted to.. but still must TRY. just endure for 2 more months.. INSYALLAH..TRY TRY TRY.

" everything happens for a reason.
if you wanna leave, i understand."